Tuesday, October 27, 2015

I Need To Call In Black

I need to Call In Black. 

No seriously. I need this to be apart of leave time at work. Sick days. Vacation Days. Family Sick Days. Maternity Leave. Black Days. Because living this life is stressful, breh.

"Hello? Bureau of Blackness? Chile. Look......."
Like, think about. We wake up to images and video of our men and women being abused, railroaded, and broken. Videos our arrests and death make the news cycle and are shown without remorse to family or friends.  Micro-aggressions about our vernacular, our sexuality, our religion or lack thereof, our womanhood, our manhood, our clothes, our forms of media, our family statuses are thrown around as if we aren't human. Like we ain't got feelings. And some days, we can take it.  Some days, we can roll with the punches, take the shots on the chin, and keep it moving.  Some days, we can deal with the professor calling us by the wrong name (Seriously? This it the second time I've taken you. YOU KNOW WHO I AM) Some days, we can deal with someone reaching up and touching our hair without our permission (I AM NOT YOUR DAMN ZOO) We can deal with other races telling us that we are too angry and we should just let things go (We ain't telling Jews to forget the Holocaust, but okay).  You can deal with people saying that Black Women are the reason the Black Community is so weak (We just gone ignore the systematic destruction of who we are? Shit. OK.) But look.

Some days. JUST SOME DAYS. You just want to call in and be like "Neaux. Noap. No. Nope."

It's on those days where I just wake up...angry.  Like every news story bothers me.  Every article about race engulfs and enrages.  And I don't mean for it too - but James Baldwin once said something along the lines that living as a African American is like living in anger daily.  It's like you have to watch every little thing you say; every social media post; every tweet; every Instagram picture.  People are WAITING for the slip - waiting for you to fall so they can egg on the situation.  Instigate the feeling of sheer...overwhelming frustration.  And when you are trying to be an example, it's HARD not to give in to the feeling of just.....slamming down a fist.

So, listen. I want to Call In Black today.  Perhaps tomorrow, too.  This means I'm not getting on social media. I'm not clicking any hashtags. I'm not responding to any tags about social activism.

And I'm definitely not reading ANY comments in the comment section of ANY news article.