Keep Calm...It's not the end

You know, far be it for me to question someone's belief system, but uh....don't you think this whole "it's the end of days because bad things are happening" thought process is...well....kind of backwards?

Here me out though.

Evil has always existed. No matter if you believe in God, Buddha or yourself.  Evil is apart of the balance that is life.  Evil has existed since the first cave man killed another for having better animal pelts.  You know what else has always existed? Nature. Earthquake and storms and wild weather has been recorded for million of years. Floods and storms are nothing new. Not at all.

So these things....Evil men....wild nature...have always been present and real in our lives. Ask someone who has lost a child  to domestic violence or ask an older person who has lived through various weather situations.

You know what IS new? Technology.

The world isn't just now going to shit. It has been going to shit. We just see it now due to Facebook and Twitter and Instagram. Look. The 24 hour news cycle was created in my lifetime and they have to fill the void. Good news doesn't sell. It never has. Scandal sells. Corruption sells. Sadness sells. FEAR sells. So we sit around and tweet about Boston and terrorism while we watch CNN. We watch the horror of Newtown and Chicago unfold as we Facebook back and forth on MSNBC message boards. And as we do these things, we perpetuate that there is no good in this world. No hope.

What I'm saying is this: bad things happen. Doesn't mean the world is ending. Just means we can't ignore it anymore.

My Open Letter to "Black and Proud"

Dear Black and Proud,

Girl, bye.

Seriously.  Did you really write this letter to Essence expecting sympathy?  Did you expect fellow black women to jump on your ship and row with you?  I really hope you didn't because honey....sister to sister....you are getting what you deserve.

You aren't getting what you deserve because you are dating a white man, as you said your family and friends would imply. No, No.  I love my black men, yet God/Allah/The Universe bless the white man that lays eyes on my fellow sisters and says "Lawd have mercy."  The rate of white men-black women relationships is at an all time high, so hearing of, thinking of, or speaking of a black woman marrying a white man is becoming kind of a thing.  

You are, to me, getting what you deserve.

You hear that? You are getting what you deserve because you traded integrity for trips.  You traded your standards for Chanel.  Your love for self for a diamond slave chain because truth be told...you're a slave. A well paid, well fed slave, mind you; but a slave none the less.  I'd call you a slave if you said your husband was Black and from Nigeria or Alabama. In the letter, you say you don't want to leave because you don't want to give up the lifestyle you have.  I commend Sister Abiola for her response to you because to ME, the moment you said you'd rather have trips, money or diamonds over the sexual respect and love of your husband, you lost me.  You really did.  I would have written you a personal response that said "get over yourself" then I would have put your letter in File 13.  You have an Ivy League degree; at least that's what you said in your letter. You know what File 13 is.

Then to say you want to have children with this man. Disgusting. Absolutely.

But yo, sister, do you. I dig it. I do. Maybe if I was in the same shoes, I'd feel the same way.  Maybe I'd try to work it out with a husband who has a heart filled with malicious slander about my looks.  Maybe I'd try to work it out with a man who openly degrades my heritage.  Maybe I'd try to work it out with a racist little pigmy of a man because he buys me whatever I want and takes me places. Maybe I would.

But I doubt it.

Discipline & Being Black

Okay, so last week, we all heard about the two daughters who were "beat down" by their father for "twerking".  Before we clear up a few things, let's discuss and clear up a few of the details::

                  1) Two girls went to stay with their father for the weekend.

                  2) Upon returning to their mother's house, she sees welps and bruises and calls the cops.

                  3) The girls were whipped with the cords from the TV and DVD player.

                  4) The girls themselves have admitted they got the punishment for sneaking out the house.

  I REPEAT: THEY GOT IN TROUBLE FOR SNEAKING OUT, NOT TWERKING

                  5) The father has been arrested and charged with corporal abuse.

So you don't think I'm making up these details

First off all, I know society. Now, the girls look to be pre-teens in the video. If they would have snuck out and got pregnant, everyone would have said "the parents should have whooped their ass more."  Matter of fact, that's the one thing everyone says when folks act out as young adults/teenagers: "If you would have got your ass whooped when you were a kid, you wouldn't (insert whatever offense)*  The FIRST thing people said when the bus driver gave the girl an uppercut was "If she would have got more uppercuts as a kid, she wouldn't have put her hands on the bus driver." But because he "got caught" (read: there was provable video), suddenly, everyone is so outraged.  Everyone is so alarmed.  It's so....wrong. Question:: Where are ya'll when these mothers out here are beating their daughters over and over and calling it discipline?

And I've heard some say that physical discipline is reminscient of our "slave days". Basically, our ancestors were beat, so we beat each other and our kids.  The unending cycle of violence and despair they say.  You know, I see their point, but as a child who HAD to have physically discipline (mental discipline doesn't work when your kid is smarter than 90% of their peers *smart black girl shrug*) I'm not going to say my parents were wrong. I can count the times on one hand my father physically disciplined me.  My mother and I stayed going round and round, but like I said, I was a handfull and I tested her on a daily. So what was her recourse?

See we don't like when people use creative ways to discipline their kids. We say they are shaming and being unfair. This is my thing: Every kid is different. Some kids don't care about time out; they didn't at 2 years old, and they won't at 15. Some kids don't care about taking a an ass whipping; they didn't at 2 years old, and they won't at 15.  Take the time to know YOUR KID and know YOUR TEMPERANCE. Screw society; screw these pseudo-child psychologist and super pro-black types. Do what is best for you and your family.

Dear Hip Hop,

Dear Hip Hop,

I miss you.

As I sit here listening to Drake's connected ass talk about how he started from the bottom, I realize how much I miss your old ways.  I miss the days of rappers kickin' what they knew.  I miss the days of you being "the black man's CNN". I miss your storytelling, so evident in "Gorgy Porgy" or "The Message".  I miss your well placed raunch and your style; how you talked about sex without making it so...horrible. 

Damn, Hip Hop. What happened?

Was it money? Was there was more money in calling black women bitches and hoes than promoting pop lockin' and having fun? Was there more money in telling black men to shoot 'em up rather than telling them to fight the power? Was there more money in letting the Jimmy Iovine's and the Clive Davis' of the world run the music that was created on the streets of Brooklyn? Was there more money in spitting lines about date rape? Or in telling our sons how to "treat a girl"? Maybe there was more money in shitting on the memory of our youth?

Was it love? Did the black community not buy enough units? Did the bootlegging started by those trying to hustle make you leave?  Did the promises of white Pre-tween money make you change your mind about the road Hip Hop was traveling on? I just....Hip Hop, I don't understand. You've always been a voice. Such an inspiration.  From the moment I was allowed to listen to you, you permeated my soul and wrapped yourself around my heart.  Hip Hop, I was in love with you.

This ain't about a few rappers in the past few years.  This is about the past two decades, Hip Hop.  Two. Decades.

Something has got to give, my love.  Something has got to give......

Back Like I Never Left

I haven't posted since December. So not cool.

It hasn't been for lack of time, mind you. I think it's more....personal space from my thoughts. I've been under a lot of stress lately, so it's hard for me to write and not just....put people out there, ya know? As open as I am about my views on various subjects, I'm actually pretty quiet about my personal affairs and the issues I go though.  True, I'll say I'm stressed, but I never really say why, and I like it that way. It keeps *certain* people from knowing your weaknesses.

Besides, things like Twitter give me the instant satisfaction of almost yelling out a thought, whereas the blog I have to actually sit and formulate something.  This has always been my downfall. I have the attention span of a 8 year old boy unless it's something I'm REALLY into. But I digress.

But look here. I have been working on a few things. I've narrowed down the storyline and characters behind the book "Confessions of a Bi-Sexual Christian", and I've changed one of my novel ideas in a series of three short stories. The poetry book "See, I've Been Thinking" has been taken back to the drawing board, but I PROMISE YOU, once these things come out, ya'll will see why I've sat on them for so long. I want to put out good work. I want to be proud. I want you to be proud.

(Just a reminder of what the cover of See I've Been Thinking will look like. Poem titles have changed. LOL)

OH! And I want to do a coffee table book. I'm thinking of calling it #Love (yes, with the hashtag and all) and I want to take intimate pictures of various couples. Black, white, gay, straight. I want it to be a reminder of the one vibration that we all share; the one that makes us soar, cry, yell and chill all at the same time.

But I digress. I just wanted to shoot ya'll an update. I'm thinking of posting a few poems and some logos that I"m currently working on. Yes, the girl is growing into her own. *presses hands together and bows* Namaste :)

Speaking For Millions

I'm really sick of these pseudo-studies on black women.

The latest study, I guess in an effort to get into the mind of the black woman, is an attempt to understand why black women don't go to the gym.  Black Women, Exercise and hair

I'm sick of the way these research papers and studies are conducted.  It's like, they take the smallest "random sample size" they can find, and just...run with it. Really, Dr. McMichael? REALLY HOMEGIRL?!?! *eye roll* As a scholar, a dermatologist, and from the reading, it seems a black woman, you should know better and should have put together a better study.

According to the 2010 census, 42 MILLION Americans identified themselves as African-American, with 28% of that 42 MILLION being black, single females. Keep in mind, I'm not counting married/divorced/widowed black women, just single.  By those numbers, that means that almost 12 Million of the original 42 Million counted are black female, and you mean to tell me, that this craptastic study that only talked to 103 women is the standard for what black females think about exercise?

"Towel Cheese" *in my Legend voice*

First off, if you want to address the situation of why many black women don't go to the gym, your study should have hit each area of the United States.  Black women in the North, West, and East appear to go to the gym more than those in the south, and my little hypothesis is based on simple conversations and social network statuses.  The South, my home, has a different approach to health PERIOD. Keep in mind, Mississippi and Alabama were ranked the most obese states in the union, and this was based on total population, not a fractured part of said population.  Second, can we address the fact that more and more black women are now natural? And the ones who aren't natural wear weaves, so what "hair" are we really "worried" about. Finally, let's address this sample size again. Like, it blows me. REALLY?!?!? 103 people. One-oh-three. They didn't even sample .000000000001% of the black female population of North Carolina, let ALONE the black female population in general.

And what blows me the most? What REALLY blows me...is that black men are reading this study and co-signing it all the way to the bank.

*le sigh*

Silly Policies Are For The Birds

So, KTBS-TV out of Shreveport, Louisianan fired their meteorologist for failure to comply with company policy.

She's gorge! Look at those cheekbones! And she resides in her house by the side of the road! But I digress.

Now, what was the policy, you ask? Well, apparently, after several Internet conversations went totally sideways, the station emailed all their employees and said that when they receive comments online that are disturbing, they are either to ignore them or tell the poster to contact the station.  After receiving a comment about her short, natural hairstyle, Ms. Lee responded, and was, in turn, fired for failing to comply with the policy.  Petitions have been filed; people are in an uproar; and even the poster himself states that he called the station.

Huffington Post (Black Voices) Story <<--- click here for links to statements, email, etc, etc.

*sighs*

For one, I think the policy of that station is silly. Instead of saying "Don't respond to anything people say about you," the station SHOULD have said "Let's TEACH you how to respond to the simplistic, mindless, idiotic things that people will say."  You know, the same way the NFL is trained to handle press, the press has to be taught how to handle the people.  Media is a tough career path to work in, and people are going to say WHATEVER they want, especially on the Internet where you can keep your identity the purest secret.  News outlets have to have policies in place that allow for any and every type of situation. Keep in mind, a white male was also fired from the same station on the same day for breaking the same policy.  So, it's not just a "black woman is fired for defending her hair" type of story; it's a "people were fired for defending themselves" type story, and to me, that's an issue.  When did defending yourself, especially in such a professional way, become such a bad thing? Why do we as professionals have to allow those on the outside to say whatever they want to us, but we can't respond in an adult fashion?

I hate the policy. I do. Because if you follow policy, she should have been fired. She broke the rules. But dammit, was there no room for leniency? Was there no room for the white guy, an eight year station veteran, who was fired? Who stands up for those who get in trouble, even when they are wrongly right?

The Re-Launch

So, due to me forgetting my account log-in for wordpress and wordpress being buggers and not "being able to locate my account"....I now welcome you all to....THE NERDY NONCONFORMIST.

*pause for round of applause*

I think I'm going to add a few things to the blog. First, video blogs will be added. I keep getting the question "Are you going to start a YouTube page?" Well, the answer is...maybe. LOL. It depends on the response to the videos.  If they ones of me by myself is received well, from there, I will expand into adding people or doing interviews.

Secondly, I'm CONSIDERING adding guest bloggers. I discuss a variety of things, but I'm well aware that I am no expert. I want to present information to ya'll that is clear and concise. Plus, while there are things that go on in the world every day, I may not have the right words to express the ideals of the blog....ergo, finding others who have similar or even opposing views maybe a solid way to go.

Finally, the POETRY. The thing that is asked for the most. *smile* Now, I won't give ya'll MUCH, considering that I am still compiling enough pieces for a nice, solid poetry/photography book...but I will give ya'll the vernacular art that might be considered "Too Hot" for Facebook or "Too Long" for the book.

The "AngyBlackNerd" was considered as a title. As was "FatSmartandFabulous". But The Nerdy Nonconformist seems so right, don't you agree?

So...without further adieu...let's go....